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Are black people the biggest hypocrites? [From Main Page]

How is it that we were so vocal in our condemnation of the Apartheid system, but we are so silent about what is going on in Zimbabwe and other parts of black Africa? Is it because in Apartheid South Africa whites were oppressing blacks but in Zimbabwe blacks are oppressing blacks? Isn’t it true that blacks have starved to death in both cases? Isn’t it true that blacks were oppressed in both cases? So where is our condemnation of Zimbabwe?

Many of us black people today are demanding reparations for slavery and the slave trade. It is very interesting to see the hypocrisy of the black race being played out so plainly. According to historical records, some twenty million black people died during the slave trade. This may be true, but they died over a period of over three hundred years. We blacks have made it a ritual to remind the world of this terrible genocide that was visited upon us.

However, while we like to remind the world of the evils of slavery and the slave trade, we black people continue to ignore even worse atrocities that are happening now - within our midst. In the Democratic Republic of the Congo, blacks are busy exterminating each other. A bloody civil war has been raging for some years now. Blacks are killing each other at a rate much faster than anybody could have done during slavery. At last count, some four and a half million black people have been killed as a result of this war.

A few years ago, blacks killed almost one million of their fellow brothers in Rwanda within the space of a few months. Slavery, and the slave trade, witnessed nothing like this! The practitioners of the slave trade would have been horrified! And talking about slavery - a few years ago the African state of Niger cancelled a ceremony that was planned for its capital. This was a ceremony that was supposed to have resulted in the freeing of thousands of slaves. The ceremony was halted because the slave owners complained that they could not go on without them.

Now, how is it that we black people can be so strong and vocal in our condemnation of slavery and the slave trade, but we turn a blind eye to the events in the DR of Congo, Rwanda, Niger and many other parts of black Africa. Is it because, in these present cases, blacks are the perpetrators and as such it’s all right? How can we condemn 19th century in the West but tolerate 21st century slavery in Niger and other parts of black Africa? Is it because, in these modern cases, blacks are the slave owners?

How is it that the black people of South Africa, which is being touted as a major regional power, could fight so hard for freedom from Apartheid and white oppression but at the same time sit down and do nothing about black oppression in neighbouring countries like Zimbabwe, Niger, the DR Congo and a host of other black African states? Why the silence?

Sometime ago, there was a demonstration against racism in Britain. According to the demonstrators, who were mostly black, the scourge of racism is very much alive. Many of these black people, and others around the world, hate racism like poison. Yet, many of these same black people discriminate against their own minorities. In many of our songs, for example, we preach hate against people we don’t like. We condemn racism and other forms of hate but at the same time we are some of the biggest practitioners of hate.

You see, the problem with us black people is that we can’t seem to understand anything. Tolerance and respect can’t be partial. Nor can tolerance and hypocrisy co-exist. We like to condemn to bad acts of others, but we see no problem when we are the ones doing them. How much more hypocritical can we get than this?

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DUMB ‘DEM’ (Cont'd) [From Main Page]

If it starts with an “a” and ends with “hole”, what is it?

Let me hear ya’ Jamaica! “Hey, ‘wudja’ do, graduate from Stupid School?”

When you went to school, did you take the big yellow bus or the little yellow bus? The little yellow bus is for retarded kids for those who require an explanation. Do you know why there are no school buses in Jamaica? Because there aren’t enough little yellow buses! Why not put a big, lighted neon sign on the roof of your car saying: “Look how stupid I am”. Species: Jamaicanus Dimwiticus.

Porche

"Keep up in traffic. If everyone else is doing 80, you can’t be doing 60. The first car behind the slow vehicle has the obligation to other traffic to pass as soon as it is safe to do so"

Being dumb is like being dead. You don’t know it! If I yelled in your ear, would it sound hollow? Don’t forget to wear your stupid badge and your “Me So Stupid” T-shirt!

If the driver coming toward you can’t see because of your blinding ignorance, he could hit a pothole, or worse, a pedestrian or cyclist, not that you would care. Or he could run into you head-on extinguishing your high beams!

Oncoming traffic has the obligation to flash you once if your high beams are on. That doesn’t mean there is a cop down the road. You should comply by dimming your lights. Some motorists courteously dim only to turn them back on just as they approach you, giving you one last blast of blinding light before they mercifully pass. Wait until you pass the vehicle before resuming your high beams.

When oncoming traffic also uses high beams we have “the blind leading the blind”. Flip that switch!

Would Jesus drive with high beams? Or would he drive with no lights at all?

Here is the rule for high beams: No other motorist should ever see your high beams, not the one coming toward you and certainly not the one you are tailgating! Brain check!

Low beams are indicated for fog and rain. Use of high beams reflects the fog back into your eyes. Use low beams in rain during daytime. It’s not so you can see, but that others can see you. Never use high beams in rain. It doubles the blinding effect on oncoming traffic.

We drive with parking lights and park with high beams. Parking lights are just that. They’re for parking. Never drive with parking lights. Always turn on your low beams one half hour before nightfall. Turn on your low beams before putting your car in gear!

TAILGATING - only inches away from a collision

What’s next after following too close? If the motorist in front of you stops suddenly for any reason and you have your teeth for lunch, what will you do for dinner?

Some motorists tailgate continuously until they can dangerously overtake. ‘Twinkle, twinkle little star. I wonder how dumb you really are.’

What should you do if another motorist is tailgating? First, lightly tap your brakes. When he sees your brake lights, he will generally back off. If he is persistent, you can overtake a slower vehicle just at the right time to pin him behind the other car. This technique is called ‘pin the jackass on the donkey’. “You can pass but you can’t ride my ass”.

And how many times do you see this scenario, only two cars on the road and one is trying to have sex with the other? Get some spaaace people! Don’t drive through the front window of the car in front of you!

The rule: Always keep a safe distance behind the vehicle in front of you. A good yardstick is one car length per 10 mph or 15 kph. For example, if the car in front of you is doing 60, you should be four car lengths behind.

Check your rear and side view mirrors frequently.

RIGHT OF WAY RULES

Traffic on a main artery has the right of way over side street traffic. Don’t use your car as a portable traffic light by obstructing the lane of right of way traffic to make a turn. Never break the plane of the right of way lane. Lean your head forward to see what’s coming, not your car!

Always stay in your lane, especially when preparing to turn onto a side street. Never impede the flow of oncoming traffic. Use your turn signal well in advance of making a turn. When turning, don’t delay, ‘git ‘er done’ to avoid a rear-end collision from approaching traffic. Use your head. It’s that ‘thing’ sitting on top of your shoulders!

Don’t drive on the shoulder. If stopped on the side of the road, wait until traffic passes before moving forward. This gives the other drivers prediction as to what you are about to do.

Do not give up your right of way to let traffic out of a side street. That’s not polite. That’s stupid! The motorists behind you can’t predict you are going to do that. Avoid rear-end collisions. Let him wait until traffic clears.

Safe driving consists of adopting a set of viewpoints. Without the RULES OF THE ROAD we have unpredictable randomity. Practice safe driving until it’s second nature.

DANGEROUS OVERTAKING

How many times do you see a some jummmboclot, some distal orificial sphinctroid, some son of Jamaica coming right at you in your lane at a high rate of speed, overtaking five cars and scissoring back into his lane a split second before imminent head-on impact? This is called ‘threading the needle’. Is there a reason this guy should ever be allowed to operate a motor vehicle ever again? And yet some will say “He is a good driver”. Is he on his way to work or on his way to the cemetery?

Some taxi drivers are good at ‘threading the needle’ but that in any other country will get you off the road in a hurry.

Driving for many is a constant succession of violations. We see it all day long and sometimes at 6 and 11. The only people who don’t think you’re an idiot are the other idiots on the road. Where is the concern for public safety when we allow people that ‘stooopid’ to operate a motor vehicle? Whoever is running the Ministry of Ignorance is doing one hell of a job.

Never pass over a solid white line or on a curve or when there is a row of cars immediately ahead of you. Never make three lanes out of two. Always take a curve slower than you think you need to, then accelerate coming out of the curve.

Passing on a curve: ‘if you can’t see, you can’t go’.

When the car in front of you is passing remember to give him a chance to change his decision. Don’t take his vacated space until he has successfully overtaken the car in front of him. When passing, always pass “up and over”. Do not cut immediately in front of the car you just passed! Act smart even if you have to fake it!

Create a buffer zone between your car and all the other cars on the road.

What Jamaica needs are 40 unmarked patrol cars with portable blue lights. Call them The Asshole Patrol.

THE SLOW DRIVER - You’re not the Grand Marshal.

Very dangerous behavior. Causes approximation of cars. Remember, two cars can’t collide unless they are too close. Causes rear-end collisions and multi-vehicle accidents as frustrated motorists demand he perform an anatomically impossible act and risk suicide to get around him.

Of course sometimes it’s just a case of someone driving with three legs in the grave.

Always drive the speed limit, conditions permitting. Slow drivers can back up traffic for up to five miles.

Keep up in traffic. If everyone else is doing 80, you can’t be doing 60. The first car behind the slow vehicle has the obligation to other traffic to pass as soon as it is safe to do so.

HOW TO DRIVE ON THE FOUR LANE HIGHWAY

Keep left, pass right. Never drive continuously in the passing lane or alongside another car. That blocks the highway for other motorists. Why do you think they gave you a four-lane highway? Never drive in the other driver’s blind spot, his back door.

PARKING

Always park parallel to the road. Never park on an angle with the tail of your car in the roadway. That narrows the lane for oncoming traffic and can result in ‘kaboom’. Never open your door as traffic is passing!

Always pull into a parking stall front first. It is safer to back out of a parking place than to back into it.

PEDESTRIAN FATALITIES - Road kill!

Five times in the last 20 years over 300 pedestrians have been killed on our nation’s highways. In 1990, 402 choked the chicken for the last time after wandering onto the roadway.

Where do you have to be to get hit by a car? Can it happen if you are in the grocery store shopping or while watching TV in your living room? Highly unlikely! To get hit by a car you have to be out in the street! ‘Out in the street and out of their misery’, there is a price to pay for stupidity. Everyone will know your name but you won’t know you’re famous!

Walk and cycle facing traffic so you can see when your demise is imminent. Always wait until traffic clears before proceeding across the street. Do not get caught in the middle of the road where you can get ‘smushed’ between passing cars! Do not walk out into traffic with your back to oncoming traffic. You’re gambling the driver coming toward you has more sense than you!

BEING A GOOD PASSENGER

There is one rule for the passenger: “LET THE DRIVER DRIVE!” It takes tremendous concentration to drive a car. The passenger distracting the driver, especially at critical moments on the road, causes far too many accidents. You can’t drive from the passenger seat! “Shut the %#&* up!”

HOW WE GET OUR DRIVER’S LICENSES?

We need not rhetorically ask because we paid for them! The driving examiners are the richest men in Jamaica, collecting an average of $12,000 from each driver “tested”. If you are illiterate, the price is $35,000! I would like to know if anyone has actually ever taken the test!

There is no driver education evident in Jamaica. Most Jamaicans were taught how to drive by someone who never learned how to drive.

If you are wondering why the police do not enforce the law, just look at how they drive. The cops don’t know how to drive either! If the guy who wrote the Jamaica Road Traffic Act is the only one who knows the law, then ‘Kingston, we have a problem’.

If the cops would just enforce the law we could pay our national debt, not to mention a ‘lunch money’ goldmine out there.

THE PROBLEM

It’s either A) something is wrong with our schools, B) something is wrong with our kids or C) both of the above. What do you think is the answer, Jamaica? If we closed all of our schools, could the people be any dumber?

The latest world population figures from the United Nations: 6.7 billion people, 1.5 billion functionals, 5.2 billion d-u-m-b-a-s-s-e-s. Spell it so they don’t know what you’re saying. Our planet is getting heavier! Too bad a brain isn’t a prerequisite for procreation.

Ministry of Labour stats: 72% of the work force is “dysfunctional”. Only 28% can do the jobs to which they are assigned. 30% of the entire population is unemployable. Do the math and you realize that only 7% of the people who live here are carrying the load for this entire nation. Most don’t know anymore at forty than the day they were born. And you wonder why the country is in the condition it is in?

If you weren’t going to do anything with your life, why did you bother even being conceived? You could have been digested!

50,000 stupid people enter our country every year by vaginal delivery. Nation building at its worst: the rapid breeding of idiots! Are we a country if the animals are smarter? Or are we just stroking ourselves? What do we have in common with cows, goats and horses? Roughly the same amount of education.

If we held THE DUMBEST MAN competition, would the winner be tied with 2.5 million others? Are 100’s of years of inbred ignorance simply insurmountable? All day, all night, all dumb. What do we have for role models in this country, people who have never accomplished anything? It’s time for zero tolerance for this epidemic of stupidity which afflicts our nation.

THE SOLUTION

Those capable of advancing this nation need to form a pact. Enough is enough! Change starts here!

Implement a Delphi system of education. Every student learns and at his own pace.

Teach them then test them. They won’t be taking the test to pass, they’ll be taking the test to STAY!

Send the academically unaccounted for to a country which desperately needs people, Mexico! Half of Mexico’s 100 million people have slipped across the border into the US. That’s the first step in making Jamaica a model nation not only for The Caribbean but also for the rest of the world.

Once the deadwood is removed, first world contractors can ring the island with garden condominiums and we can invite the wealthy of the first world, who are tired of freezing their asses off, to come here to a model land of true freedom, education, health care and the best climate on earth. The money they bring in the form of taxes will make potholes and crime prehistoric conditions of the past.

We’ll keep our best 7% and they will form the nucleus of the New Jamaica. Name change anyone?

Are we ready to go to our windows and shout “I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take this anymore”? God bless this Idiocracy.

Look for my upcoming commentaries:

MARRIAGE, IS IT LITTLE MORE THAN LEGALIZED PROSTITUTION?

RELIGION: HOLINESS OR ASS-HOLINESS, WHICH?

THE TWO GREATEST FRAUDS EVER PERPETRATED AGAINST MANKIND - THE LAW AND RELIGION! FIND OUT WHO IS BEHIND BOTH!

SAY IT! THE LETTER “H”

THE MOST CATACLYSMIC EVENT IN JAMAICAN HISTORY

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